it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
is wine microwaveable?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
