i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
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Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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