I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
