maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize