He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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