awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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