On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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