omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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