mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
You can't motorboat a personality
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
