After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
