Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
