so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize