you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
