Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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