I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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