he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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