My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize