Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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