Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
