I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
