Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug