So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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