You really coming over, don't trick.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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