she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
