But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
