there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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