a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Randomize
