That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
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