I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
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Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
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Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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