I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
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