Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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