she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize