i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
