Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
