dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
PANTIES FOUND
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