Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
