I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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