I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize