Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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