Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
