I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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