people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
