i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
