And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
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