4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
My vagina just clenched in fear
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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