last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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