I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
