What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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