why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize