Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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