i just google imaged poop.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
